Stairway to Heaven

-- Horatio Algeranon's rendering of the classic Led Zeppelin tune

There's a skeptic who's sure, temp that goes up is good

And he claims it's a stairway to heaven

When he gets there he "knows", if the future's foreclosed

With a dollar he can get what he came for

Ooh, ooh, and he claims it's a stairway to heaven

There's a graph on his blog but he wants to be sure

'Cause he knows sometimes graphs have two meanings

In a tree by Yamal, there's a proxy that sings

Somehow all of its temps are misgiven

Ooh, it makes him blunder

Ooh, it makes him blunder

There's a feeling he gets when he looks at the BEST

And his spirit is crying for leaving

On his blog he has blown rings of smoke through the trees

And confusion for those who stand lurking

Ooh, it makes him blunder

Ooh, it really makes him blunder

And it's whispered by Willie Soon if we all call the tune

Then the Inhofes will lead us to Reason

And a pay day will dawn for those who stand long

And the board-rooms will echo with laughter

If there's some chaos in your climate, don't be alarmed now

It's just a spring clean for the Maldives

Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run

There's no need to change the road you're on

And it makes him blunder

Your blog is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know

James Inhofe's calling you to join him.

Dear Tony, can you hear the windbag blow and did you know

Your stairway lies on the global temp?

And as we wind on down the road

Our shadows taller than our soul.

There walks a scientist we all know

Who shines white light and wants to show

That he ain't in it for the gold.

And if you listen very hard

The tune will come to you at last.

When all are one and one is all

To be a rock and not a troll.

But he claims it's a stairway to heaven...

Temperature (and Brain) Farts

– by Horatio Algeranon

The temperature changes in fits and starts

Steps and ramps and even farts

But that don’t disprove man-made warming

Or even prove it ain’t alarming.

 

 

 

What is "epsilon"?

-- by Horatio Algeranon

“Epsilon” is nearly 1

If we burn oil as we’ve done

And “epsilon” is “oopsolong”

If we prolong this crazy run.

Horatio's answer to the question posed by Tamino:

What’s the chance that if we continue with business-as-usual, man-made global warming will lead to disastrous climate change? It isn’t zero. It isn’t one. What is epsilon?

The Cycles on the Blog

-- Horatio Algeranon's take on the popular children's song
(sung by "Cosmic Ray and the Deniers")

The cycles on the blog go round and round
Round and round
Round and round
The cycles on the blog go round and round
All around the Web


The graphs on the blog go up and down
Up and down
Up and down
The graphs on the blog go up and down
All around the Web


The trend on the blog goes only down
Only down
Only down
The trend on the blog goes only down
All around the Web.


The noise on the blog goes only up
Only up
Only up
The noise on the blog goes only up
All around the Web.

The cherries on the blog get picked and cooked
Picked and cooked
Picked and cooked
The cherries on the blog get picked and cooked
All around the web


The science on the blog is non-existant
Non-existant
Non-existant
The science on the blog is non-existant
All around the web


The sea-ice on the blog is in recovery
In recovery
In recovery
The sea-ice on the blog is in recovery
All around the web

The driver of the blog is Cosmic Ray

Cosmic Ray
Cosmic Ray
The driver of the blog is Cosmic Ray
All around the Web.


The blokes on the blog claim "It's the sun",
"It's the sun""
"It's the sun"
The blokes on the blog claim "It's the sun"
All around the Web.


The Stevies on the blog cry "wah wah wah
Wah, wah, wah"
Wah, wah, wah".
The Stevies on the blog cry "Wah, wah, wah",
All around the Web.


The posts on the blog go round and round
Round and round
Round and round
The posts on the blog go round and round
All around the Web

Feel free to add your own verses.

The Serpent Tamer

– by Horatio Algeranon

The Uncertainty Monster

Has been tamed

By the one

Who’s aptly named

Tamino tames

The data snakes

And even more

Ferocious fakes

"Tamino plays his magic flute in hopes of summoning Pamina and Papageno. The tones summon a group of magically tamed beasts, which listen in rapture to Tamino's music" -- from wikipedia article on Mozart's opera "The Magic Flute"

Cause for pause?

-- by Horatio Algeranon

The "warming pause"

Is without cause

But I regress

Instead of guess

At zany "theories"

That break known laws.

A new paper by Foster and Rahmstorf (which uses "multiple regression" to estimate and "subtract out" short term variations in the temperature signal due to el Nino, volcanic eruptions and solar output changes)  indicates that the claim of a "pause" in warming over the past decade is simply not supported by the temperature evidence (not to mention the minor fact that ithe claim has no basis in physics, given that the atmospheric CO2 level has continued upward, which scientists know induces warming)

Foster and Rahmstorf

"With the bulk of the fluctuations removed, the continued course of warming over the entire time span (including the last decade) is undeniable." (from "The Real Global Warming Signal" )

Posterity's Promises

-- by Horatio Algeranon

Why should I

Give to Posterity?

What has she

Ever done for me?

Posterity is always

Procrastinating

Says "Tomorrow"

She'll be waiting

To give me riches

And her charms

Keep me from

The Future's harms

But I'm quite sure

She won't deliver

Never does

So don't believe her.

 
 
H/T Sir Boyled Roche, Groucho Marx,  Winston Churchill or whoever it was that said "Why should I do anything for posterity? What has posterity ever done for me?"